I’m very much one who apologizes easily, I tend to default to thinking I’m the one who was wrong and needs to take corrective action. :) My sisters and I fought constantly when I was growing up, so the performative apology you describe perfectly sums up how I was initially taught to “say sorry.”
Ironically, my former experience as a Christian taught me about the need for a contrite heart, though I’ve thankfully given up all the hateful baggage that came with that experience, such as a rejection of science and a disdain for certain communities. Thanks for initiating this discussion!
Thanks for responding, and you brought up a point that came to mind for me related to growing up evangelical Christian & attending their schools (1st - 12th grades): are Christian churches and schools providing us with a solid foundation in knowing how to apologize with a truly contrite heart? I remember hearing a lot about the "seventy times seven" when it comes to forgiving others, but I don't remember ever hearing about how we're supposed to let someone know when they have wronged us or crossed a boundary.
Oh, wow, you gave me flashbacks with that “seventy times seven” reference! Lol Great question! I know from my own experience it was very one-sided. I would be quick to apologize, but asking for an apology would lead to accusations of being “overly sensitive.”
I’m very much one who apologizes easily, I tend to default to thinking I’m the one who was wrong and needs to take corrective action. :) My sisters and I fought constantly when I was growing up, so the performative apology you describe perfectly sums up how I was initially taught to “say sorry.”
Ironically, my former experience as a Christian taught me about the need for a contrite heart, though I’ve thankfully given up all the hateful baggage that came with that experience, such as a rejection of science and a disdain for certain communities. Thanks for initiating this discussion!
Thanks for responding, and you brought up a point that came to mind for me related to growing up evangelical Christian & attending their schools (1st - 12th grades): are Christian churches and schools providing us with a solid foundation in knowing how to apologize with a truly contrite heart? I remember hearing a lot about the "seventy times seven" when it comes to forgiving others, but I don't remember ever hearing about how we're supposed to let someone know when they have wronged us or crossed a boundary.
Oh, wow, you gave me flashbacks with that “seventy times seven” reference! Lol Great question! I know from my own experience it was very one-sided. I would be quick to apologize, but asking for an apology would lead to accusations of being “overly sensitive.”
Right! Jesus had boundaries - why else would he be flipping tables?! So why couldn't we have boundaries, too?